Film Friday: Lawyer Dog and The Incredible Injustice

Let’s talk about the meme in the room, okay? This Film Friday, I’m eschewing a discussion of traditional media and the law and diving into the depths of internet memes and news stories to talk about a current events issue and, hopefully, put people on notice that the police are not your fucking friends when they’re talking to you and, even if you think you’re being absolutely clear, you have to literally use magic words to be entitled to your full constitutional protections.

That said, let’s dive into the case of the “lawyer dog.” 

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Guest Post: “3 Different Jobs in my First Year as a Lawyer, and I Wouldn’t Change a Thing”

[Boozy’s Note:  Today’s post is a guest post from Bill M. Hours (obviously not a real name, though wouldn’t it be awesome if it was?). Bill is an insurance defense drone and loves every minute of it, having lost his soul way back in the early weeks of law school.

Today, he’s talking about how the legal job market sucks, I mean really, really sucks, and how he learned this jumping from sinking ship to sinking ship in the industry right out of law school. However, much unlike myself, Bill is an eternal optimist about people eventually landing in a field that makes sense.

I do not endorse his optimism. But far be it from me to disparage Billy Boy’s feel good kumbaya moment, right? So I’ll shut up now and let Bill talk.]

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One For The Furry Jury: R.C. Fox and the Amazing Summary Execution


Alright.  I want to talk about something today, and before I do we need to be really clear:

I’m not defending pedophiles.

I’m not defending pedophiles.

I am not defending pedophiles.

I want that to be really clear, because I’m putting on my lawyer hat to discuss a bit about the R.C. Fox scenario that’s a-brewing on the western side of this lovely Commonwealth. I’m doing this to clear up what seem to be some pretty widely held misconceptions and misrepresentations of the known facts in relation to this. This is pure commentary, coming from someone with a working familiarity with the system and the ability to dispel a few of the misconceptions right off the bat.

And frankly, I’m about to piss some of you off. Because, goddammit, guilty or innocent, every accused person deserves a defense. That’s why I do what I fucking do.

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Dracula: The Deadbeat Client

It’s Monday on Lawyers & Liquor, and the first order of business is “Where’s the second episode of the podcast, asshole?” Well, the answer boils down to “I’m a technological incompetent with little ability to do things without a person holding my hand.” The audio recording of my interview with this episode’s guest, Chad Murray from, came out fucking awful on my end and has forced me to amplify my entire half of it…and of course I didn’t record it as two separate tracks and shit, which would have made sense. So it’s been a painstaking process, but the next episode will be out this Wednesday, so that shit’s at least sorted out finally.

Next, tomorrow’s Halloween, and I fucking love Halloween. It’s the time of year where people get to dress up as terrifying monsters, which for me simply entails wearing my normal daily lawyer get-up, and go passively rob people of their candy through a series of vague threats. “Treat,” the little bastards cry, “or trick.” It warms my soul, what little bit of it remains, to see the next generation getting the hang of armed robbery so goddamn early.

But for lawyers, every day is fucking Halloween, isn’t it? I mean, we all deal with monsters in some capacity in our work, from murderers to child molestors, all the way down to the guy that’s simply not going to pay his bill and put some small company out of business because they’re a fuckin’ skell, right? Right, motherfuckers, right. And, in fiction as in reality, lawyers have represented some horrible fucking monsters, haven’t they?

Like Dracula.

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InkedFur’s Furry Friday: A Minor Problem, Part 2 – Socializing with The Youngins’

Hello out there my freaky furry friends! It’s time for another Furry Friday here on Lawyers & Liquor, as we continue the shitstorm stirred up last week in handling minors that may wander through your lives in a fursuit. Last time, while you cool cats and odious assholes sat on in horror, I talked a bit about romantic and sexual relationships, both on and off-line, for people that are below the age of 18, even if they’re over the age of consent in their home state. This time, though, we’re gonna skew to the innocent and start talking about what to do in social interactions with minors, online or otherwise, that aren’t at all sexual or romantic in nature.

So let’s all collectively strain at our leashes as we go for walkies through the dog park of Furry Friday: A Minor Problem, Part 2.

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