Site/Boozy News – Lawyers & Liquor

The Badger Returns – Kind Of

Boozy hasn’t had his coffee, but he has had a mid-life crisis and now he’s going to make it your problem.

Recently in my Discord, and again over on the Patreon, I asked for a little assistance from the folks that have followed my stuff for a while. It wasn’t much of an ask, but it was probably an important one for me to make.

When I started Lawyers & Liquor it was under the moniker of the Boozy Barrister, a foul-mouthed lawyer who tried to make observations about the law, legal occurrences, the practice of the same, and things of that nature. It evolved over time, I believe, especially when the readership went from some lawyers, judges, and legal professionals to a lot of laymen wearing fuzzy suits. It turned more into a profane discussion of the law itself as it applies to things pertinent to that user base.

Then, of course, the podcast – Boozy’s Legal Funhouse, available wherever mediocre self-serving vanity projects are streamed – overtook a bit of that with the help of a dear friend and performing partner. As time moved on, Lawyers & Liquor took more of a backseat to the myriad of other things I was working on doing. To the extent that, while I always maintained the domain, I let the site itself go down for years before restoring it a couple years back with the grandiose concept I would slide back into the weekly written word format some of you remember but many of you who found me well after the fact have completely forgotten: profanely and angrily discussing areas of law and the application of the same with the help of a trusty straw man.

So I loftily promised a return to the written format, the grand re-emergence of a sarcastic, angry, and profane sentient whiskey glass turned cartoon badger. I sat down and started one article…then another…then another…then another…then – okay maybe it’s just easier to say my Google Docs folder is filled with a lot of random articles that have anywhere from a couple sentences to several paragraphs and that I walked away from each one because when writing them it just didn’t feel right.

See, the Boozy Barrister – and to no small extent the origins of the character of the Boozy Badger – came from a place of anger, frustration, and no small degree of isolation. It was an outlet, a way for the person behind those characters/personalities to vent. I have always said that Boozy is me, just me turned to 11, and I think the same is true when I look back at older work, routines, and written pieces. Boozy has mellowed as I have mellowed, Boozy has calmed as I have calmed, and Boozy has found community as I have found community. So when restarted this site I didn’t take that into account – I tried to start writing the same things I had written before, in the same voice, and in the same character.

I failed miserably at doing that. Because I am not the same person I was when this site started, dear weird readers, and we first took a journey together. I’m older, wiser, more relaxed, and honestly quite a bit more comfortable than I was then. Only took me about fourteen fucking abandoned articles to realize this – I can’t write with that voice anymore, because I don’t hear that voice anymore.

Which leaves me with a bit of a quandary, because you see I have this site, and this site means a lot to me. I don’t think I would be exaggerating too much to say this site, and what came from it, effectively saved my life to no small degree. It gave me back things that I had been missing from my life through the connections and community I found as a result of it and – to no small extent – parrots and sovereign citizens. So I don’t want to let it die.

But I don’t know what to do with it anymore. I want to write, but I don’t know what. I want to start it, but I don’t know how. I want to talk about the law profanely and amusingly, and about the life of lawyers, but I don’t want to be bitter and angry nor do want that to be all I talk about. That, honestly, is where the Discord and Patreon discussion came in: what do I do here?

I used to be a boat guy and I have stories to share. I used to sell pulp horror fiction, and maybe I can write that again. I know much about the law, and I want to share it. But I’m not sure how.

So here’s the deal: We’re gonna try this like a vanity project for a while. I’m gonna post something once a week, mostly on Saturdays, at the least and we’ll see what happens. Maybe it will be law. Maybe it will be a discussion of community. Maybe it’ll just be my grocery list. And, as always, you’ll let me know if you like it or if you don’t and I’ll make a decision as to whether or not I give a shit about your opinion (spoiler: I really don’t).

Hope you’ll hang around for it. If you don’t that’s fine, Boozy as he is isn’t everyone’s cup of tea. But if you do, I’m looking forward to hopefully amusing you at some point.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I have a picnic today.

-Boozy

Boozy’s On The Road: 2026 Schedule Starting!

Hey everyone, it’s time to toss myself out there once again as there’s a new year a-moving!

While I may not have the whole schedule for road appearances done yet, I have started putting them out there over on the Appearance Schedule part of the site (there’s a link up above) and can presently announce I’ll be showing up to and performing at the following events this year as of now!

Fursquared – Milwaukee, Wisconsin – February 5-8, 2026

Furthemore – Baltimore, Maryland – March 27-29, 2026

Anthrohio – Columbus, Ohio – May 22 – 24, 2026

Anthrocon – Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania – July 2-5, 2026

Is there an event you were hoping I’d pop in to? Are you throwing an event and want a weird middle-aged guy who acts like a cartoon badger to come and scream at your attendees? Well, let that event know or, in the case of the latter, my email is always open!

I promise, I’m a cheap date.

Long Time, No Tea

Good Morning my little legal reprobates! Have we all accepted that I am absolute shit at keeping my promises? Because I could have sworn that I promised I would be updating this place and trying to get it designed as a much more professional site and working on posts and all of those fun content creation things that people promise to do and then I, promptly and without warning, fucked back off into the internet ether again.

Sorry about that shit.

I type this from a nice hotel room in Detroit, Michigan – which in true fashion means I’m actually typing this from a nice hotel room from Ypsilanti, Michigan outside of Detroit and I think technically closer to the college town of Ann Arbor. It’s almost 8 in the morning as I sit here sipping on a shitty cup of hotel coffee (having first had to run to the desk because I chugged all the good coffee left and was left with only decaf, which we all know is Satan’s Bean Juice). I have a day of comedy shows ahead of me, my spouse in the shower, and I’m wearing nothing but denim in my bid to convince the border guards I’m actually a Canadian in case I need to slip over the border to start a new life as a moose milker in Newfoundland. It’s been a couple months of shows, travel, and work in that thing I call a day job and in that time things on here kind of went by the wayside.

Not because there’s nothing legal going on – one merely need to glance at the news to know that there’s plenty of legal shit going on in the world. The wholesale dismantling of the constitutional protections of due process is not least amongst the things that are presently “going on.” But there are people a lot smarter than me who have said a lot of good things about that topic much faster than I could given all the daily commitments I have, so I’ve been letting them. Sorry about that

See, I’m already apologizing. I’m a shoe-in for Canadian citizenship, they truly are my people.

Anyhow I’m dropping in to let you know that I’m alive and working on a post for this place about the constitutional levels of review and scrutiny that are applied by Federal Courts (though I’m not sure how much longer a discussion of anything constitutional is going to matter) that I plan on having up this upcoming Thursday. Tonight I’m recording a live show of the Legal Funhouse before our now-standard audience. And I’ll have some more tales coming up soon. We’re working on getting the home office and recording studio back together, and I’ve been chugging through an old adventure game each week over on my Twitch channel in the evenings if you like that sort of shit.

I’ll see you all again soon, and if you happen to be in my area this evening feel free to track me down and say hi. I’m lonely and need the auditory fellatio of praise.

See you soon,

-Boozy

Chasing Boozy, or How I Ended Up Back Here

“Look at this morose motherfucker right here.”

–Jay, Chasing Amy (Kevin Smith 1997)

It was either that or I took an Eminem lyric and did the whole “look who’s back” thing and let’s just be honest, anyone who was familiar with my happy ass back when this site originally went on-and-then-off line isn’t going to believe there’s one goddamn thing slim about me. Take that as you will.

That’s right, it’s been a long time but the Boozy Barrister, who these days is more often found in the form of a large and surly sentient cartoon badger, has crawled back out of whatever deep hole he fell into. It’s been a while, and while I could tell you why Lawyers & Liquor stopped having even the most cursory of updates and then quickly went offline as some really long, involved, and dramatic tale it really comes down to one thing: money. Cash. Cold hard moolah. The green stuff that most people have in their wallets but not me because I live in the 21st Century and if I’m gonna get robbed it’s going to be digitally, baby. Not that the site was costing too much to keep up – although let’s be honest since it was always more of a vanity project than anything else it did essentially turn into a money-sucking set of hosting fees in place because I refused harder than a January 6, 2020 Republican to let go of things – but more the fact that the pandemic (which would have been around the last time you and I spoke in any long form written format) kicked my jurisprudential ass all over the place.

Dear God, How Complicated Can This Be?

So, obviously, I’m trying to get the new site set up. The issue is, this shit seems to have changed significantly in the past few years. So, please, I beg of you, hand in there with me for a little bit while I figure all of it out and try to get a website that doesn’t look like ass going.

However, while we’re waiting, I will start the posting and such. Because you know, why wait for something to be done well when I can simply half-ass it for a while.